Stasven Obituary - About 5 Months Late

iDrmzIt wanted me to make this post to get closure thinking that it’ll encourage me to do something else with my miserable existence. Might as well try it, I guess.

This is about 5 months late because we shitcanned the project in April, which was eagerly anticipated by all >30 members of my dead Discord.
If you’re reading this and you’re in there, you should probably leave it. There’s literally no point staying there.

If you were on the forums between 2018 and 2020, you might’ve seen like 16 Stasven Teaser # posts that I did where I showed pictures of this funky lookin map that looked a little bit like this:

If you even remotely cared about this when you saw it back then, you’ll probably be interested in the following wall of text. If not, feel free to close this post and go back to watching the last 10 or so users of the SDG forums fight each other for likes. Those threads are much funnier than this one.

If you’re reading this, cool. You’re at least remotely interested in how not to fuck up an Unturned total conversion project.

It was a great learning experience for both me and Drmz in terms of modeling and environment and all sorts of visual stuff, but other than that it was not a fun project to work on.

The list below is 5 major reasons (in no particular order) behind why Stasven went from flooding #modding:modding-discussion to vaporware in maybe 2 months.

List of Fuck Ups

1. I can’t manage a group to save my life. Not even one other guy. It took 2 1/2 years for Drmz to convince me to hand him a copy of the map and the Unity project. I don’t know why I did this, but I did.

2. I can’t organize a Unity project to save my life. Here, I’ll show you:
This was not worth fixing.

3. I honestly didn’t want to make the mod in the first place, but I felt some kind of ‘obligation’ to make and finish it because I had a bunch of canned projects I built up over the years from when my PEI v3 map was relevant.

4. I spent too much time making guns. The only even remotely polished content in the map was guns. There’s almost nothing else in the Items folder. Objects were plentiful, but I spent more time cranking out some cool looking pistols instead of furnishing buildings and actually finishing the goddamn map.

There were over 70 guns.
In my defense, I had fun making them.

and lastly, the biggest killer of them all:

5. Stasven was just too ambitious for us.
2 guys who’s accomplishments are a shitty nostalgia bait PEI upscale and an actually-pretty-neat oversized horde beacon would not be able to pull a Elver 2.0 out of their asses. Not even a miracle would help with that.

Now because this is tagged as map-content, I’m basically legally obligated to show pictures of Stasven so people won’t ask why the hell a wall of text is tagged as such.

Instead of flashy, carefully curated pics of the map that were taken as to hide how hilariously unfinished it was, I’ll post development pics:

Development Pics




Kuwait’s ‘goner plushie’ hidden in the Icarus safezone was a test object I made while helping Animatic with making objects play sounds
(it’s supposed to screech at you when you press E, but it broke between then and release)

The Kuwait cats began life as an NPC idea me and Animatic came up with while he was working on the caracal animals

And before I leave Unturned for good:

12/24/2017 - 4/7/2021

created by: FalkenJr, iDrmzIt, and CrashLogger
special thanks to: Animatic, SDGNelson, and the LVDiscord


Haven’t been active here in a while, but I just wanted to stop by and pay my condolences :pensive:

RIP Stasven, you tried something adventurous and new long before the other greats of the curated world had much of a chance. I don’t think we’ll ever see anything quite like what it was aiming for, but Falk I hope you are able to find greener pastures elsewhere and I wish you the best of luck. Rest in development heaven. o7


RIP Stasven

i buy files for 500 ruble very good deal


Personally, I blame the cat for the map not releasing. It makes too much sense


I really like that picture of the hot muscular man


In my six or seven years of Unturned, I’ve seen my fair share of ambitious mods fail. Massive weapon lists, tons of maps including North America, Russia Insane, among countless others I can’t remember. But Stasven was always different. Not only did it look and feel different, it was. A total conversion mod was unheard of for Unturned, and needless to say I was fucking hyped. Drmz and Yourself are both talented modders, even if you think your published works are rather lackluster, they’re some of the most iconic (and memed) in all of the community.

Being in LVDiscord and watching development over the past few months was fun and it’s downright unfortunate that it ended not with a bang, not with so much a whimper, but being brought out back behind the shed and given the 12 gauge foreversleep. But I’m hopeful that your failures and learnings will live on and inspire the next generation of modders that their utterly insane concepts can be achieved.

With that, RIP Stasven. You won’t be forgotten.

But you legally are required to publish that ‘Big’ shirt on the workshop with any other meme attire you might have. That shit’s funny.


sad to see the modject go :pensive:

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I was really hoping for this map to be completed.


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oh wow, this looks amazing…

but we have elver now, so its alight.

RIP Stasven

can i have the files for lords of the locker room clothes i need it for medicinal purposes

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